Sick Kitty etc.

One of my cats is a bit under the weather.  He was neutered and had immunizations and blood tests last week and took almost 2 days to recover from all that.  Then yesterday he had a few more shots as a
follow up - because he was a stray he needed to have 2 doses of a few shots (feline leukemia was one
of them).  He seemed ok during the evening and jumped on bed for a cuddle for half the night then he
left for other sleeping quarters - a cushy chair in the kitchen.  When I woke up he was still in his chair
but a little lethargic and cried when I tried to move him.  I did pick him up and put him on the table in
front of the window in the tv room.  He whined and cried as though it really hurt.  I was almost in tears
myself.  I called the office as soon as it opened, and they  gave me an appointment for 9 am.  I got
there at 8:30 or so and they took me right in.  He had a temp of 104 F and that is kind of high for
such a little guy.  The doctor said that he was like this after the last shots he had at the time of the surgery     so she thinks that maybe next time he should get half of the shots and a few days later the rest.  That's
ok with me, but it will cost me for 2 visits. But when you have  pets, you have a responsibility to take
care of them which includes food, shelter, love and medical needs.  Just like having children.

 And just just like children you have to plan for their lives if you should die before they do.  Rescuing is
 complicated because if you take in a stray and are barely able to feed it,  not able to give medical attention
or provide for them after you are gone should you not take the cat in?  Then if no else does is he better off?
  As a community all of us need to be more responsible pet owners and do what we can to help them.  A
warm home with cheaper food, and no medical care is better than living on the streets and getting
attacked by dogs, cars and cruel people who hurt them as sport.  I guess it's all relative and one
can only do so much.  But keeping an animal off the mean streets or dangerous wooded areas is
certainly a worthy goal.  I hope a time will come when there are no more homeless people or
animals.  We have so many charities devoted to this problem that it's hard to pick which one to
support.  But I think any of them  would be good.  My favorite is "The Cathouse on the Kings" in
California (northern) because I love cats and they do too. They have a huge area ( several acres)
all fenced in so the cats can be outside and still safe.  There are a few cat friendly dogs there as well.
They will even take on pets who survive their people.  It is necessary to make arrangements in your
will and there is a cost for the estimated care.  I think I will do that for my kitties some day.  Right
now I'm not expecting to die anytime soon (don't we all say that?).  I'm pretty sure my daughter
won't step up and take them, although she does have a cat and some other pets.

My other favorite cat rescue is the Blind Cat Rescue.  That is a beautiful safe place for blind cats.
I think there are a few cats with other type handicaps and some with multiple handicaps who get to live
theirs lives in a warm, safe, happy environment and have their needs met.  It is an amazing place: clean,
safe, and cat friendly to the max.

I Hate Football

I hate football!! There I've said it.  I don't care who hates me for that comment.  I think football is a brutal sensless endevor masking as a sport.  I suppose it's worthwhile if one has a great football career and makes
enough money to hire caretakers when his brain becomes spongelike and he can't remember his name. I know that as a result of football and other college sports some men (boys really) are able to get athletic scholarships to many colleges.  Which college may depend on how good he is in high school and where his heart is.  When I think honestly about this situation I have to wonder what would I give up to have the perks that come with attending a good college, a scholarship if I'm good enough, and maybe a pro contract if I'm great or lucky or both.  I don't know what I'd do, but I have an aversion to pain (anyone's, not just mine). Almost all the men in my life have been drawn to the game, screaming at the tv, and adoring the players  who score. But the one who has been with me the longest and the last (including father, brother-in-law, ex-husband, father-in -law etc) is not that interested in it.  He understands the rules (I don't) etc. but has no desire to watch it on tv, or even at a stadium.  He thinks that time would be better spent making money.    
Of course pro football and basket ball etc players do make money when they are good or excellent players,
but often it is at the expense of marriages, health, and sometimes even loss of life.  Is it worth it? It wouldn't
be for me, but I guess maybe it might be for some, especially men who think their masculinity is based on
performance in any area.  I guess nursing was a good career for me.  It wasn't too dangerous,  paid fairly
well, and required that I stay alert and meet academic and work certifications requirements.  In short I
had to use my brain, and my body (8-12hr.on my feet) to meet career goals etc.  I didn't get rich, but I
have a decent pension and enough savings to not be too worried about retirement unless we have
runaway inflation, high medical expenses.   But the athletes who abuse their heads and bodies may have
a lot of money, but paying even for the best nursing home at 50-60 years old is not my idea of a good
retirement  

my cats

Until recently I have had 3 cats with whom I share my home, and they are sweet and all very different.Then about 3-4 weeks ago a little long-haired tuxedo cat befriended me. He'd been living on the streets for about a year and half. My neighbor had been feeding him since May of 2012. She believes he was just dropped off because he was so young, but also so friendly that it was unlikely that he was wild. Then this year about a month ago he showed up in my back yard, and of course I made friends with him. He began showing up everyday and I of course fed him. I slowly introduced him to my cats and they seemed to just ignore each other. With that I decided to try to get him to the vet for shots and neutering. That took some planning, but he wouldn't cooperate. Then he showed up one morning, and I called the vet and the tech said they'd squeeze him in. He's almost all set needing only one more visit for follow-up shots. He's very affectionate, playful, cuddly, and jumps in my lap. He's also a bit unpredictable scratching me a few times on my face, and he howls during the evening - wanting to go outside. I am afraid if he goes out something will happen to him or he won't come back or he'll he'll pick up fleas (not likely in the winter, though)or get hit by a car, or chased by a mean dog (although we only have one cat chasing dog that I know of, but really, isn't one enough?) My vet said that even coyotes have been killing cats in some areas, and that terrified me too. So he's becoming an indoor only cat, but he's not thrilled with that life style at all. I have to run around with strings and balls to play with him and thereby distract him from thoughts of the outdoors at night. I guess I shouldn't complain. The exercise is probably good for me, but it's also tiring. I just hope I don't find
 anymore cats.  I can't aford anymore, for sure, and with the possibility of a move to FL in the future and
the prospect of moving 1500 miles with 4 cats, I'd really can't take any more cats into my home.  As it
it is, I don't know how I will get them to FL.  Flying has one set of problems and limitations and driving
has another.  What to do?  I have lost sleep over this problem and still have no definite plan.

Coping with ADD

Earlier this year I was tested for and diagnosed with ADD/ADHD.  This is probably more common then

we realize.  When I was a kid 50+ years ago there was no knowledge of this disorder, and when it was 

finally identified, it was also described as a problem with boys.  If girls behaved the same way they were

considered poorly behaved, parents didn't discipline them enough etc. anything but ADHD. Remember 

the H referring to hyperactivity can also refer to hyperactivity of the mind IE flitting from one thought to another, and daydreaming too.  For me daydreaming was an escape from an unhappy existence.  My

parents were OK, but my teachers were nuns and they were rigid, controlling, stern and sometimes

down right mean. But in fairness to them, they didn't know that these problems could be physiological

rather than just behavioral.  They also had performance expectations for behavior and academics. They
were right to demand some order, but they were unfair in the distribution of penalties.  For some reason
unknown to me boys were allowed a lot of leeway when it came to behavior.  Much more was expected
of girls and punishments were harsher and readily handed out to girls who dared to be restless, inattentive
or any number of behaviors found to be unacceptable (such as asking questions, or daydreaming). Physical
punishment such as hitting were not common, but did happen and most often to girls though they were
usually better behaved than the boys.  I think the problem was rooted in expectations.  Girls were simply
expected to behave better and boys, well "boys will be boys" was the thinking of that period.

In any case I exhibited all the usual behaviors usually  associated with ADD: not paying attention, interrupting, talking when I shouldn't and always in the dark about assignments, test instructions etc. I         did better with written or printed instructions so I could recheck etc.  To my mother's credit she wasn't a harsh disciplinarian and believed me if I told her I tried.  There were times, though when I gave up in despair, crying and insisting I just couldn't do it. I didn't know  what the teacher wanted or how to do it.  It was frightening at times.

Today I see teachers like the ones who were interviewed  after the tornadoes in the Midwest and the 

teachers from the Sandy Hook shootings and I think they are so special.  I wonder why I didn't have

nice teachers, ones that cared.  In high school I did have at least one teacher in each of  my 4 years of high school  that I was able to connect with and some that seemed to understand me.  I found some of the male teachers more tolerant and accepting of me.  

Many years later I went to nursing school as a young, newly divorced mother with a small daughter. I 

somehow managed to graduate with honors, but it took all my energy, and I think my daughter missed so      much of my time. Her father pretty much ignored her, but my mother adored her and made up for some

of the sadness she incurred from  her divorced parents, her busy mom and her uninvolved father. My father
was also very fond of her and to some extent she could do no wrong, but he was also quick to anger given
even small provacations.  But she learned how to manage him early on.

Recently I've been reading a magazine about ADD//ADHD.  My therapist lent it to me, and it is  anamazing
magazine.  It's articles have hit a sensitive part of my brain.  It has made me wonder how I ever managed
to get through school, and 34 years of hospital work (as an RN).  From mixing up appointment dates, to
hiding things on myself it seems that I'm always stressed out whenever I'm doing something important.  It is
sad because no one knew about learning disabilities and ADD when I was a little girl.  The nuns dealt with
my indiosyncracies rather harshly.  I have no good memories of elementary school.  By high school I had
managed to work out some strategies to help myself.  I was not a happy kid most of the time.  During the
summer when I could get lost in reading library books I was happier.