Winter - No Wonderland

Winter is here, I know - my hands and feet are turning white especially when I'm outdoors. My home is cold (conserving oil)so they get white indoors too. The only time I'm comfortable is after I'm in bed for about a half hour and have begun to warm up. I think an electric blanket might be in my future. I don't want to be a complainer, but winter brings out the worst in me. Despite all that, I do bundle up and take one of my cats outdoors for a romp almost everyday. He doesn't mind the cold and loves to be outside. He has a tantrum when I bring him in after 15-20 minutes. He also waits for an opportunity to sneak out whenever the door is opened. Someday he'll trip me, and I'll break an arm or a leg or drop a dozen eggs all over the place. Then there's snow: wet, cold, sticky, slippery, miserable snow. We shovel, we sand, we use kitty litter but it still melts a little in the sun and freezes after dark, and in the morning the stairs, driveway, and roads are perilous. The high winds will blow you down the street, mess up your hair and chill you to the bones. At night when it freezes again the lids on trash cans become frozen tight and sometimes car doors freeze shut. If the snowfall is heavy and wet it can be very difficult to shovel and remove. Then there's the time after the snow - in a few days it becomes dirty, Is there any good in all this? Well, freshly fallen snow is beautiful especially at night. The moon shines on it on the ground and on leafless trees giving everything a mystical appearance. The little kids like snow to play in, and those a bit older like it because school is usually canceled for safety reasons (giving them an extra day to get that report done, or study for a test). Snow falling on a night with a full moon (or 3 quarters)looks erie and amazing as the moon or street light catch the snowflakes en route to the earth. Of course scientists tell us that no 2 snowflakes are alike, but I don't know how they could prove that. I read an article about it once, but I didn't really understand all of it and retained even less. Icicles are also pretty amazing as they form along the edges of houses, trees, power lines, tall buildings etc. Another thing that happens is that the air during and after a snowfall seems so fresh and clean as though dust, germs, pollutants and odors have been washed away by the snow. Sometimes the snow appears to have a slight bluish tint at night (a little bit even in the daytime too)gleaming and sparkling. But no matter how beautiful it might appear, if there is way too much 10-12 inches it's just overwhelming when trying to clean it up and if it's a wet snow it can be so heavy that some roofs will collapse or be damaged, most likely older roofs. Then it becomes dangerous and expensive to repair. I'm sure there are many more positive and negative comments that could be made, but this is all I can think of this evening. Feel free to leave comments and let me know what I've missed.

Problems with Hunting

I admit it: I'm an echo freak, and an animal advocate. I don't do as much as I should, but I worry about it and feel for the animals that are harmed every day for profit. Sadly, the people who are responsible for the killing of elephants for ivory, and other animals for fur or food derive some sort of sick pleasure from the pain inflicted on them. I have had a few discussions with my brother-in-law (not really discussions, more like he yelled, and I didn't get a word in). He maintains that killing deer, wolves and other animals hunted for food, fur, or skin actually improves the herd and that the gun clubs actually help the survival of the animals by killing some animals. He believes that they reduce their numbers so they don't starve. I don't actually disagree with this premise, but I don't believe that hunting has anything to do with it. Thinning the herds may have some sort of benefit, but putting a bullet between the eyes (figuratively) of a doe or buck is not something I ever want to do. I think nature has a way of thinning the herd and doesn't need any help from us. Besides how much do you think the deer that is killed thinks it's ok? Also I don't think the hunters are careful enough or have such good aim that they don't make mistakes. I think they go for the biggest and healthiest deer and there is little compassion for the one they hit. Having said that a part of me thinks that what they do (the hunters) is better than what we see happening to animals in the slaughter houses and factory farms. So there is really no answer that is good for the animals. Thinning a herd means we kill one individual so that others can survive long enough to mate and reproduce and then we can kill more. Also the hunters usually go after the biggest and healthiest animals, not the sick and weakest. The only answer is vegetarianism and I'm close to that, eating meat only 2-3 times a week. I worry about that, but I also see that the wolves attack the deer and the death of the deer is not quick or painless. So are we that different from the animals. And while I would not kill an animal to eat it, I do eat meat. My compromise is to not eat meat for 2-4 meals in a week. I don't use cows milk (almond milk is good), but I like cheese, eggs, and chicken which causes me a great deal of anxiety. What is the answer? I wish I knew, but I have an early day tomorrow so I have to go to sleep without answering my question.

Tick Season: Not Yet Over

I found a tick on me last evening when I put my PJ's on. I'm not sure what kind it is, but after looking around online I think it may be just a plain dog tick which would be good news. I will call my MD today and find out what the nurse practitioner thinks. Lyme ticks are usually abundant in the spring so that also gives me hope that this won't be a serious problem. next day So the tick was one of the Lyme/dear ticks. Size and color gave some clues, but the defining issue is the bullseye welt it leaves on your skin - an outer red circle and dark spot in the center. It itches and hurts at the same time, but scratching doesn't help. It also feels hard to touch. You must have antibiotics, doxycycline as early as possible to prevent the Lyme arthritis disease. Doxycycline is the drug of choice, but if you are allergic there is probably an alternative. The thing is these ticks aren't through for the season yet. A mild autumn has allowed them to reproduce more than usual so they willcontinue to be a threat for several more weeks. I still have leaves to finish raking and bagging. I'll have to try clothes that cover most of me snugly. Not the best thing to wear for hard work in the yard. Pets can bring them into the house, but my cats don't go out so I only have one way to pick up these horrible creatures-- being in the wrong place - outdoors. So I guess I'm staying inside until the first snow. My advice to the readers -- Be careful out there. It's a tick jungle.

Remembering my mother

Today I found some of my mother's belongings (she died in 2010). One item sort of touched me. It was a spiral bound notebook that I had given her with a sign on the front in large print saying "If you come to visit me and I'm sleeping, please wake me up. I can sleep anytime, but can't visit any time. If you can't bear to wake me then at least leave me a short note so I know you've been here." Sadly the visitors were mostly too shy to leave a note - only a few actually left one. I now have that notebook and finding it was like finding a small part of my mother. I did a lot for my mom, was truly her caretaker and significant person for many years and now she is gone. No one lives forever I know, and a part of me is glad that she is no longer suffering, but I truly wish her last years had been a little better. She was lonely, felt isolated and because of her poor hearing didn't have much conversation. But she refused to use a hearing aid so that part was her choice. That made it hard for her and our family to converse and feel a connection. When communication is absent or very difficult it usually gets even worse with time. And in my mother's case it did. But there were some good times. One of my best memories is the last birthday she had about 2 months before her death. I have written about that day in one of my journals and shared the story with some cousins. Perhaps I will write it here. It will lift the spirits of anyone who reads it.

Listening Skills

I wrote this entry for my writing group this morning and decided to post it here as well. Our topic was about personality traits which are valued and of course those which we might not want to have. As is usual we are free to approach the topic in any manner we choose. The following was my essay: So many personality traits to think about, but after some thought I have decided that "listening" is first on my list. Sadly I am not a good listener. I 'zone' out frequently and sometimes miss important information. But when someone listens to me and draws my attention with questions and comments I am so pleasantly surprised and sometimes amazed and remain engaged longer. For me listening trumps almost everything else, and yet I struggle with listening and paying attention. Taking notes helps me keep my focus, but that is not always possible. It is not a lack of interest that causes my wandering mind, more like a computer that freezes and needs to be rebooted. But how does one reboot the mind? So when I'm with someone who listens and gets the information the first time around I am in awe of his or her abilities and generally honored if I am the one to whom they listen. Good listeners make the speaker feel important and respected. Poor listening skills require tolerance and patience. I have worked on my listening skills my whole life, and I continue to train myself to stay tuned to someone who is speaking. Politicians are a challenge, but provide me with an opportunity for some serious practice to improve my listening skills. But the process is slow.
I should say Donald Trump is not someone to whom I choose to listen.  I try not to be too political,
but at times I must be honest also.