Thoughts on a weddings

Weddings are a sort of fairly tale. Little girls who dream of being a princess but were not born to royalty or wealth see it as a sort of "Princess for a day". I think it is interesting that the word princess carries the feeling of youth, beauty sweetness, kindness and gentleness - much more so than the word queen which to me seems sort of harsh, controlling and unyielding. Both  I believe may be due to the stories about royalty both in history and in current media, fiction or non-fiction. 

There is also somewhat of a  feeling of entitlement connected to the word princess (my little female cat Chloe is a good example) and sometimes used in a derogatory way toward demanding women who simply expect that things will be a certain way and accept nothing less.  And sometimes the princess bride can behave accordingly, but is usually forgiven the indiscretions.

So it seems that weddings are really for the little girl still inside the woman.

For a man it may be his most generous gift to the woman he loves - going along with the pomp and circumstance mostly for her and sometimes pretending he's enjoying it. For the most part this seems to work well for many couples.

Second marriages and weddings seem to be more about sharing and hoping and making decisions together. I don't know this through research, but believe it more from observation.

Of course finances play a part in the festivities. Weddings can be so costly, but usually a couple can manage a gown and a suite for the bride and groom and a sit down dinner for at least a small number of guests. Thus making the bride and groom the royal couple for at least a few hours.

The symbolism of the white dress and veil suggesting innocence and purity adds to the mystique - though very few couples would actually meet that criteria. The parents of the couple get to see their daughter as a princess for that one short time or their son as the strong and loving prince who will protect and care for his bride and the children that may follow. Presumably both sets get to see the radiant happiness and tenderness between the couple that makes all parents get goosebumps

Sadly this is not always the case, but the dream is a nice one. Everyone at the wedding - guests, attendants, family members all share that dream at least for a day.